How you act when you hear a dirty joke..
With your friends:
With your family:
With younger kids:
April 2012
How Homo Are You? →
en.shindanmaker.com
Dae’s homo level is [□□□□□□□□□□] 0%!
Evan’s homo level is [■□□□□□□□□□] 10%!
Wow lies its waAY HIGHER THAN THAT!!
Hayley’s homo level is [■■■■■■■■□□] 80%!
…Yep. xD
chat’s homo level is [■■■■■■■■□□] 80%!
woops
Kyle’s homo level is [□□□□□□□□□□] 0%!
Well that can’t be right let me try again.
Kyle Farren Bean’s homo level is [■■■■■■■■■□] 90%!
That’s better.
[■■■■■■■□□□] 70%!
Emmie’s homo level is [■■■■■■■■■■] 100%!
Anastacia’s homo level is [■■■■■■■■■■] 100%!
Accurate.
Novaya’s homo level is [■■■■■■■■■■] 100%!
oh……
Ewan’s homo level is [□□□□□□□□□□] 0%!
lets try this again…
Ewan Donovan’s homo level is [■■■■■■■■■□] 90%!
that’s close enough.
The 5th and 7th GIFs starting with the letter K are your escorts to the ball. The last GIF starting with the letters "ST" is who you're going to dance with.
Your escorts to the ball:
Who you’re going to dance with:
Submitted by: Anon
escrts to teh bakl:
who imma dance wwith:
for the person who rp'd john
ectoBiologist [EB] joined chat
turntechGodhead [TG] joined chat
TG: sup egbert
EB: oh, hi dave!
EB: i’m alright.
EB: okay no, i’m actually not doing so hot.
EB: major levels of not okay.
TG: bro to bro talk then
EB: wait gimme a sec to take my pain meds.
TG: wait what
TG: you take meds
EB: well now i do.
EB: :(
TG: fuck
EB: something happened yesterday after .
TG: why didnt you tell one of us
EB: what do you mean?
TG: you shoulda told us
TG: me or lalonde or harley
TG: fuck what happened
EB: well i’m telling you now, aren’t i?
TG: ok continue
EB: i don’t know what’s going on, but something’s happened to my legs.
EB: dave,
EB: i can’t walk.
EB: it might just be the universe slapping me in the face,
TG: what
TG: what no
EB: but the boy who could fly can’t walk anymore.
TG: youre ok right
TG: this is just a prank
TG: haha veryy funny
EB: dave!
EB: i’m not kidding.
EB: it even hurts to sit, and i don’t know why!
TG: holy fuck
TG: youre really not kidding
EB: my hips ache, and i can’t feel my legs from the shin down.
EB: of course i’m not kidding.
TG: i
TG: fuck
EB: i don’t know what to do.
TG: so you dont even know what happened
EB: no, i don’t.
TG: shit
TG: crap im coming over somehow
TG: i dont know how
TG: but im going to come
EB: dave, what am i going to do?
EB: i’m really, really scared.
TG: egbert
TG: john
TG: just wait
TG: i swear im going to come over
EB: gosh, just.. please
EB: i really need help.
TG: shit does your dad know
EB: yeah, he knows.
TG: oh fucking god
TG: the moment bro comes home im getting tickets for the first plane over
EB: i can’t even make it up to my room anymore, dave!
EB: my room is on the second floor.
TG: just
TG: just trust me ok
EB: okay.
TG: youre not at your computer are you
EB: i’m using my laptop.
EB: i’ve been sitting on the couch.
EB: can’t do much else, right?
TG: shit where is my fucking bro when you need him
TG: i dont care if he kicks my ass into tomorrow
TG: just where to fuck is he at a time like this
EB: what is he at work or something?
TG: yeah
TG: fucker actually got a real job
TG: but now hes coming home later and later
EB: well when does he get off?
EB: and what kind of job does he have?
TG: i dont know both
TG: he always comes home at random times
TG: and kicks my ass when i ask
EB: hehe, maybe he’s got an embarrassing job or something!
EB: like he works at mcdonalds or something dumb like that.
TG: maybe but thats not the point
TG: are you hurting
TG: like
TG: a fuck lot
EB: yeah.
EB: yeah, i am.
EB: i’m on three different kinds of pain meds,
EB: what do you think?
TG: i
TG: jegus
TG: dont tell me the doctors
TG: are trying to poison the crap outta you
EB: i don’t think so!
EB: but they don’t know whats wrong either.
EB: the best bet they have is that the nerves in my legs have begun to eat themselfs.
EB: *themselves
TG: what
TG: wait what
TG: what the fuck is this crap
TG: what did you ever do
EB: i don’t even know!
TG: how do
TG: nerves eat themselves
EB: how am i supposed to know?
EB: all i know is that i’m in so much pain,
EB: and i..
EB: i don’t even.
TG: egbert
EB: why did this have to happen?
TG: youre the bravest fucking man ever
TG: you dont deserve this shit
EB: no one does, dave.
EB: no one.
TG: no
TG: you
TG: never
TG: may as well been fuckin me
EB: no!
EB: i would never wish this on you, dave!
EB: never never never!
TG: john
TG: you saved our fucking universe
TG: and its trying to kill you
TG: how fucked up is that
EB: i don’t even know.
TG: i would take all that shit
TG: because john egbert
turntechGodhead [TG] disconnected.
turntechGodhead [TG] joined chat
TG: does not fucking deserve that
TG: shit internets dying a bit
TG: shity crows
EB: it’s alright, okay?
EB: at least it’s isolated.
EB: for now, anyways.
TG: oh god no
TG: fucking no
EB: it hasn’t spread past my hips,
TG: if youre gone
TG: im going to hell to drag you back
TG: and kick you ass
EB: and the doctors said it wouldn’t spread anymore.
EB: i’m really hoping it doesn’t spread anymore.
TG: fuck this shit
TG: im going to sell my soul to satan
TG: to find a cure for that
EB: dave, i have something to tell you.
EB: it’s really important, okay?
TG: anythig egbert
TG: and if bro doesnt come in five minutes
TG: im hijacking the next plane to washington
EB: dave,
EB: dave.
EB: i love you.
EB: i’ve loved you since we were thirteen.
TG: i
TG: fuck
TG: john
EB: you don’t have to say anything, okay?
TG: you sit tight there
EB: i just wanted you to know.
TG: bros home
TG: im coming
TG: im going to get my ass whooped
TG: and then shipped to washington
EB: alright.
TG: just
TG: trust me on this
TG: and somehow
TG: well get through this shit
TG: and
TG: just know when im off
EB: just know what?
TG: in less than ten hous dave fucking strider
TG: is going to your house in person
TG: hours
TG: and
TG: john
TG: i
TG: love you too
EB: you..
EB: you what?
TG: so
TG: fucking wait
TG: until i haul my ass over
EB: you love me?
EB: you actually..
EB: oh my god, dave.
EB: i’ll be waiting, okay?
TG: ok
EB: i’ll sit right here and wait for you.
TG: nows not the time for sappy shit
EB: okay.
TG: because im leaving for the airport now
TG: and
TG: you better have clothes
TG: im not packing anything
TG: no time
EB: see you soon, dave.
TG: bros yelling for me to move my ass
TG: and
TG: see you
TG: dont you dare die on me
TG: ever
TG: not when i just got the fucking love of my life realized
EB: i won’t, okay?
EB: i promise.
EB: i’ll be here waiting.
TG: and dont stress yourself
EB: i won’t! i’m too excited.
TG: no
TG: i wont stand for it if yo uhurt yourself more
TG: just sit
TG: and ill be at your door
TG: tell your dad to bake a cake
TG: and
TG: bye
EB: bye dave!
EB: i love you.
TG: uh
TG: love you too
turntechGodhead [TG] disconnected.
turntechGodhead [TG] joined chat
TG: and make sure you tell lalonde and harley
TG: they need to know too
EB: of course!
TG: were all the best fucking friends
EB: i’m pestering rose as we speak, okay?
EB: i’ll tell jade next.
TG: and im glad we met john
TG: through harley
TG: she has all my thanks
EB: me too.
EB: jade’s the best ectosister a guy could ask for.
EB: [[can i just say bravo?]]
EB: [[i adore the way you play dave.]]
TG: ((um this is ooc right))
TG: ((ok confirmed))
TG: ((sorry i got confused for a moment but thanks))
EB: [[yep.]]
TG: hah
TG: i could say lalondes great too
TG: when shes not being a prick
EB: hehe! i bet rose would love to hear that.
TG: and
TG: make sure to tell her
TG: about us
TG: like
TG: yea
EB: oh you mean like..?
TG: shes going to laugh at me if i do it
EB: alright, i can do that.
TG: and i tell harley
TG: to be fair
EB: no problem!
TG: i am so fucking glad i still have these ishades
TG: almost lost them
EB: so you’re on the plane?
TG: driving
TG: almost there
TG: shitty plane doesnt have wifi
EB: how did your bro take it, by the way?
EB: and oh.
EB: that sucks.
TG: just
TG: i dont know how i can wait so many fucking hours
TG: without knowing youre okay
TG: bros fine with it
TG: i pulled the no shit card and he understood
EB: oh wow.
EB: did you tell him about us?
TG: he
TG: probably guessed
TG: the seriousness and shit
EB: i guess so.
EB: dad knows, by the way.
EB: i might’ve.. shouted for joy earlier.
EB: hehe?
TG: jegus egbert
TG: i would have snorted
TG: if it wasnt so serious
TG: just take care of your legs
EB: i will, okay?
EB: i promise.
TG: and to show how serious this shit is
TG: im going to stoop as low
TG: as to using
TG: <3
TG: okay
EB: oh wow!
TG: egbert you got that
EB: that is serious.
EB: can i just..
TG: thats how fucking serious
EB: <3
EB: there.
EB: see that?
EB: that’s for you.
TG: and were at the airport
EB: aww, okay.
TG: and the only crap im carrying is this shitty backpack
TG: with one change of clothes and my laptop
EB: okay so you’ll breeze by security.
TG: maybe if they stop me im going to run back to the care
TG: car
TG: and bust out a shitty sword
TG: and then see if they want to stop me
EB: don’t get in too much trouble, alright?
TG: ok
TG: and i must go
TG: holy fuck
TG: is that a tear i see in bros eyes
TG: i must be seeing crap
TG: im that excited
EB: oh wow!
EB: i’ll see you in a couple of hours, right?
EB: and woah, is your brother actually crying?
TG: im not sure
TG: he absconded before i could ask
TG: striders are masters at beatdowns and absconding
EB: haha, i guess so!
EB: dad’s making brownies and chicken pot pie, btw.
EB: both baked goods.
TG: ((do we do a time lapse or something here)) so your dad isnt making a cake
TG: i thought he always made cake
TG: or was that your grandma
EB: [[yep! ;D]]
EB: well, i begged him to make something other then cake for once.
EB: but it’s still baked goods.
TG: ((okay so when dave leaves ill just sign out and be back in a moment ;p)) egbert i dont know whats wrong with you
TG: every kid likes cake
TG: except you
EB: i know, i’m living the life every 3-year-old dreams of.
EB: but i reeeeally don’t like cake.
TG: shut up all i get is puppet ass
EB: is it edible?
TG: smuppet ass is not edible
TG: that is terrible mental images
EB: oh god, i just imagined a smuppet-shaped cake.
EB: never let my dad meet bro, okay?
TG: haha
TG: i heard bro used to know this guy with buck teeth like you
TG: but his name wasnt egbert
EB: haha, what was it?
EB: and what time does your plane board?
TG: in 10 minutes
TG: shitty wait times
TG: and then name
TG: fuck i forgot
TG: it started with an e
TG: but after that i blanked
EB: oh wow, really?
EB: oh well.
EB: but weird coincidences, right?
TG: yep
TG: i cant help but think
TG: that he had a brocrush on this e dude
EB: guess you striders like goofy teeth, huh?
TG: it runs in the family
TG: to fall for dorky teeth
EB: i bet they make you swoon.
EB: just a glimmer of these beaver teeth and you’re down for the count!
TG: haha i fell so hard for you i had to take my shades off to stop them breaking
TG: i just feel shitty
TG: that youre the one in pain
TG: but youre making me laugh and feel better
TG: though it should be me helping you
EB: don’t feel bad, okay?
EB: i like making you laugh!
EB: :B
TG: oh
TG: were boarding now
EB: see you soon, okay?
TG: and now i have to sit through all these fucking hours
EB: just take a nap or something!
EB: get your sleep while you can.
TG: striders dont sleep
TG: they wait
TG: which is my fucking downfall
EB: hehe, you seem excited!
EB: but anyways, i’ll let you board now.
EB: have a good flight!
TG: bye
TG: ugh
TG: <#
TG: <3
TG: this is making me nervous
TG: bye john
TG: so
TG: yeah
EB: <3
EB: bye!
turntechGodhead [TG] disconnected.
turntechGodhead [TG] joined chat
TG: finally out from the shitty flight
TG: ass is sore
TG: no legroom for last minute seats
EB: oh wow were you in coach or something?
EB: oh yeah do you want dad to come pick you up from the airport?
TG: uh that would be nice
TG: i kinda forgot that detail
EB: alright i asked dad he said that was fine.
EB: he’s heading out in a couple of seconds.
TG: ok
TG: wait
TG: are you okay at home alone
EB: i’ll be fine, okay?
EB: it’s only a 30 minute ride to the airport from here, anyways.
TG: ugh thats an hour back
EB: what’s one hour? it’ll be fine.
TG: so i will keep you company through
TG: a series of random chats
TG: ok
EB: that’s fine!
EB: just talking to you is making me feel better, hehe!
TG: i dont think strider powers extend to making people feel better
TG: but whatever works
EB: hehe, i guess!
EB: should i put a movie on while i wait or something?
EB: gosh, i’m really excited to see you.
TG: no no no
TG: youre going to put on con air
TG: and then relate in disgustingly clear details
TG: every single part of the lame story
EB: actually, i left con air upstairs.
EB: i was just going to watch whatever movie’s on tv.
TG: oh
TG: though once i flipped through tnt
TG: and con air was fucking playing
TG: back to back marathon for cage
TG: the rock was playing too
EB: oh!
EB: i found practical magic.
EB: :B
TG: huh
EB: this movie’s kinda girly, but i guess it’s cool.
TG: speaking of nic cage
TG: you stole the declaration of my heart
TG: ok that was the shittiest pick up line ive ever heard
TG: why did i use it
EB: haha!
EB: that’s really cute.
EB: umm..
EB: you must be the dub to my step,
EB: because i wub wub wub you.
TG: though ive been itching to use that ever since the brocrush developed
TG: shit egbert
TG: haha
EB: hehe! do you like it?
TG: yea
TG: and
TG: did you really
TG: uh
TG: say you liked me since we were 13
EB: yeah, actually.
EB: why do you ask?
TG: funny thing
TG: i kinda did too
TG: thought it was a passing crush
TG: and holy fuck i found myself in deep shit when it didnt go away
TG: but im glad
EB: me too.
EB: i was scared, because i thought
EB: “hey! i am not a homosexual!”
EB: i guess i’m just davesexual, huh?
TG: i remember you saying that to vantas
TG: haha ladies flock to me
TG: but they didnt have derpy teeth
TG: and stupid black hair that goes everywhere
TG: and they werent john
EB: that is..
EB: really, really sweet.
TG: well i am eyecandy or so ive been told
TG: and hey will your dad know who i am
TG: its around time now
TG: so i look for a guy in a hat and pipe
EB: i told him, yeah.
EB: and i showed him some pictures@
EB: do you see him yet?
EB: he brought cupcakes, just fyi.
TG: uh
TG: shades making it a bit hard to see
TG: i dont want to take them off
TG: oh
TG: maybe thats him
TG: i think i see that weird hat
EB: white fedora?
TG: yep
TG: and holding cucakes
TG: cupcakes
TG: found your old man
TG: now what do i say
EB: just say hi, introduce yourself, ect.
TG: hey mr egbert im coming to mack on your son
TG: i dont think that will work
EB: haha!
EB: just tell him your name.
EB: he might give you the “don’t hurt my baby” talk, though.
TG: oh fuck
TG: is this the meet the parents moment everyone dreads
TG: well i think you have it worse
TG: cause its my bro youre dealing with
TG: and i have a cakeman to talk to
EB: efff.
EB: you’re right.
EB: will your bro make me strife for your love?
TG: haha just swindle him with your teeth
TG: he will be reminded of his past woes
TG: oh fuck now i sound like a jerk
EB: no, no!
EB: hehe, its fine.
EB: will he swoon at my teeth?
TG: jegus what if he does
TG: i dont want to fight my bro for my
TG: uh
TG: its boyfriend right
EB: yes, duh!
EB: unless you have a cooler name for it.
EB: do you?
TG: brofriends maybe
TG: indulging in heated bromance
EB: hehe, that sounds cheesy!
EB: but i like it.
EB: :B
TG: the good thing about these shades
TG: is that i cant still pester you
TG: while zoning out on your dads speech
TG: i hope he doesnt notice
EB: haha, he’s actually giving you ‘the talk’?
EB: what is he saying?
TG: um
TG: let me listen for a sec
TG: ok hes on the part
TG: hell track me down and cake me to death
TG: if i hurt you
TG: ok that sounds like a nice way to die
TG: but id rather stay alive
EB: haha, really?
EB: oh wow, he actually did it.
TG: can you even die from cake
EB: yes.
EB: yes you can.
TG: wait what
TG: suffocation or something
EB: he will overfeed you.
EB: until you pop.
EB: a very gruesome death.
TG: nevermind if dont want to die
TG: striders die with their dignity
TG: not 500 pounds of cakefat
EB: i know. be happy he didn’t describe it.
EB: you guys on your way yet?
TG: yep
TG: and im holding the cupcakes
TG: while walking to the car
TG: fuck he said he parked like fifty miles away
TG: why are airport terminals so fucking big
EB: ugh, he probably did that just to show off his cupcakes.
EB: gosh, dad! just start a bakery!
TG: maybe he has his own mini bakery in his room
TG: you just dont know about it
EB: pffft, that would explain a lot.
TG: you said you saw in his room before right
TG: yes finally reached the damn car
EB: yeah, once.
EB: oh great!
EB: lemme warn you about his music.
EB: warning; don’t touch the dial.
EB: just don’t.
EB: you’ll regret it.
TG: uh
TG: ok
TG: you know him best
TG: so i guess i will follow your sage advice
TG: oh wise egderp
EB: i’m serious.
EB: he gets really cranky without his micheal buble.
TG: well i think i wont risk 500 cakes
TG: so i will have to follow the egderps warning
EB: just listen to your ipod or something, okay?
TG: ishades
TG: i alchemized them
TG: they still stuck around though
EB: what do you mean?
EB: oh and my movie’s done.
TG: some of the stuff disappeared after the game
TG: but the ishades are still there
TG: dont know why
EB: i know, right?
EB: a lot of my extra computers disappeared.
EB: but whatever, who even needs that many computers?
TG: oh
TG: that time you dropped your laptop in the ocean
TG: adele rolling in the deep
TG: fuck sorry i wanted to make that joke
TG: anyway
TG: i was harleys server player since your computer was gone
TG: and she had computers on every piece of her clothing
TG: i dont know if she still has hers
EB: oh wow, really?
EB: she was prepaired, huh?
TG: ((and the dave butler joke john cracked in that one conversation haha)) yea
TG: oh wow look at the time
TG: ten more minutes if your guess is right
TG: fuck
TG: too bad the stupid flying skateboard broke
EB: oh yeah, that might’ve been useful.
EB: [[and lawwwl]]
TG: the cakes are smashing against the lid or something
TG: frostings stuck on the top
EB: ewww.
TG: your dad doesnt go insane at failed food experiments hopefully
TG: maybe they taste good but car rides
TG: kind of screw food up
EB: haha, i know.
EB: i don’t think he thought of that ahead of time.
TG: well
TG: if i eat them before he can see them
TG: huh
TG: will he let me
TG: cupcakes are for the guest right
EB: of course!
EB: not that i’ve ever really had anyone over before.
TG: so who ate the cupcakes then
TG: was it you
EB: me.
TG: haha
EB: yes it was. it was me.
EB: it was my job to eat the cupcakes.
EB: :((
EB: so many cupcakes, dave.
TG: so your windy thing must have been really good
TG: to carry all that cupcake weight
TG: oh and
TG: youre not hurting too bad right
TG: couple minutes left your dad says
EB: not right now i’m not, these meds work wonders.
EB: but if you want to go up to my room to talk you might have to carry me.
EB: i’m not fat, btw.
EB: i just have cupcake butt.
EB: :B
TG: so is the b your teeth or your cupcake butt
TG: and dont worry im fucking more than in good shape
TG: i have a ninja puppet master for a bro
EB: those are my teeth doofus.
TG: who i strife with almost every day
EB: and i bet!
EB: is this the part when i whistle?
EB: all “i got myself a catch! mhmmm!”
EB: pffft.
TG: haha but we have to be careful
TG: i didnt really listen to your dad
TG: and dont know what he allowed
EB: oh!
EB: probably something along the lines of coming down for meals and going to bed at reasonable times.
EB: and he might’ve said something about ‘being safe’.
EB: did he?
TG: dunno
TG: wasnt listening
TG: ishades and pesterchum with you
ectoBiologist [EB] disconnected.
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EB: hmm?
EB: either way, it sounds embarrassing.
TG: and uh
TG: what we can even do in front of your dad
TG: but first things first
TG: nice house
EB: oh wow, you’re here?
EB: and thanks!
EB: [[para format now? :33]]
TG: haha and im taking the squished cupcakes out
TG: you dad just kinda stared and
TG: then asked if i was okay with it
TG: and im like
TG: squashed cupcakes are still cupcakes
TG: ((okay :p i am slow))
TG: ((but lemme come back once i fix the quirk))
EB: [[kay!]]
EB: [[wait, how does that work?]]
TG: ((i just copy the link and then start a chat wth the quirk off and then exit that chat and then come back here))
EB: [[kay! :DD]]
TG: ((^^))
EB: [[i’ll be waiting, i guess!]]
TG: ((I think it’s fixed!/testing))
EB: [[yay!]]
TG: ((Is your quirk on?))
EB: [[I don’t really use quirks, bro.]]
EB: [[otherwise i couldn’t do this: :B ]]
TG: ((Aha xD Good point I guess))
TG: ((so you start? Because Dave is holding the cupcakes))
EB: Oh. Huh. Dave was here already? It felt like barely a moment, and he was already here! Setting down his laptop, the bespeckled teen reached over to grab his crutches and began the short trek to the front entrance. He swung open the door, heart in his throat, and beamed. “Oh hi Dave!”
TG: Dave didn’t know what to say, since his throat went dry. After a moment, he caught his voice again and asked, “Egbert? Why are you…” After a moment of realization he almost dropped the cupcakes and demanded, “You sit back down before you kill yourself by tripping and falling flat on your face!”
turntechGodhead [TG] disconnected.
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EB: John pouted, twiddling his thumbs while propping himself up against the doorway. “I really wanted to greet you, okay? And umm.. gee this is embarrassing..” Chuckling nervously, the brunette shrugs a little. “I really didn’t think ahead when it came to waddling over to the door, so can you um… carry me back to the couch? My legs are tired just from making it to the front door.”
TG: Not answering him, Dave shoved the cupcakes into John’s arms and then proceeded to sweep him up off the floor and make his way further inside again. “This is just fucking embarrassing in front of your dad,” he hissed good naturedly. “Now where’s the couch? You have a freaking big house.”
EB: “Hehe.. it’s down this entry way, the first archway on the left.” John shifted in Dave’s arms, waving at his father over the other’s shoulder. “Hey! Our house isn’t that big, is it? It’s just a house.” John gave Dave a little pat on the cheek, smiling at the blonde happily. “So how long do you plan on staying here with us? I don’t mind you staying for a log time, but will your bro mind any?”
TG: Following the directions, he took long strides and found the couch with the computer still flashing on the table. He answered, “I don’t know… Bro said call him or go on pesterchum to tell him to buy the tickets back home. He didn’t actually say when by.” Trying his best to place John on the couch gently, he winced as he dropped him slightly and bounced on the couch. “Cupcake butts are as fucking heavy as they sound, Egbert. I don’t know how long I’ll stay, but probably at this rate a really long time.”
turntechGodhead [TG] disconnected.
turntechGodhead [TG] joined chat
EB: Bouncing lightly on the couch, John winced a little as he felt his hips shift. It didn’t really hurt at the moment, but it was sure to later. “Well, I hope you stay awhile. I’m really happy you’re here, you know. I would be devastated if you had to leave tomorrow or something.” From his perch on the couch, John could hear his dad get started on dinner. “And my butt is so not heavy! You’re just unused to so much non-plush rump in your vicinity.” He was just teasing, really. Poking Dave on the cheek, he flashed those pearly whites at the other. “Hehe!”
TG: “Hey, I don’t carry cupcakes eating boys every day,” he chuckled while turning his head away. Dave was beginning to feel the small flush in his cheeks rise. “And where do I stay, this couch here so I can carry you everywhere?”
EB: “Hmmm..” John gnawed on his lip as he thought, rolling thoughts around in his head. “Both of the guest rooms are full of junk right now, so you can either join me in my room or sleep on the couch.” Thinking back on what he said, the heir amended that. “You can sleep on the floor like a gentleman, or use the air mattress or something.”
EB: [[Or Dave can join him on the bed later for snuggles? idk, your choice.]]
TG: ((did you see the update just now?)) Dave nodded absentmindedly and replied, “I can sleep on the floor, just get me a pillow or some shit and I can sleep. Hey, I can borrow your clothes right? Cause I only brought the spare in my backpack.” Dropping said bag on the floor, he adjusted his shades to stop them from falling off from their dangerous placement on the edge of his nose.
EB: [[yep! :U]]
ectoBiologist [EB] disconnected.
ectoBiologist [EB] joined chat
EB: “Oh yeah, of course! Like I’m going to let you wander around in filth. Tsk, tsk! Oh yee of little faith.” Chewing on his lip again, John slowly wiggled himself closer to Dave, intent on leaning on him. “You’re a little taller than me, so my jeans won’t fit you, but I guess my t-shirts and sweats can! Don’t worry about it, okay? I’ve got this covered.” Leaning on the coolkid’s shoulder, John snatched the remote and began channel-flipping. Dad was starting dinner, after all! So it wouldn’t hurt to pass some of the time with some good old fashioned TV.
TG: “Remember when we were practically the exact same height at 13,” he said randomly while sinking lower into the sofa. Why was John so fucking close to him? He was basically screaming inside but keeping his face straight. After all those years having a crush on his best friend, he was sitting next to him while watching John flip through the channels. The sunglasses started to slip off again at the angle he was looking down at, so he started to push them back up again. It seemed like the shades were trying to fall off today or something. Only after a while did he notice John was staring at him. Blinking, he asked, “What, do I have bird poop on my face?”
EB: [[lawl, isn’t it normally to get all touchy-feely with people they like? xD]]
EB: [[*normal]]
TG: ((yus but dave is scared))
TG: ((he thinks maybe he might scare him away or something xD))
EB: [[pffft. john is going to be SNUGGLE QUEEN.]]
TG: ((haha XD dave is fucked))
EB: “Yeah, I remember. What’s in the water over in Texas, anyways? You shot up like a bean sprout! Stop being so much taller than me, you jerk.” Poking Dave’s face, he chuckled. “I dunno, really. I kind of just feel like staring at your coolkid face, okay?” Leaning fully onto Dave’s side, John got comfortable as he found some random movie for background noise. “Am I not allowed to look at my boyfriend? That’s not a problem, is it?”
EB: What, was Dave nervous about getting stared at our something? This could be fun to mess with, now that he thought about it.. A slightly sly grin took over his face, and John made sure to lock eyes with those black shades, trying his very best not to blink to often.
TG: When John extended his finger forward to poke his cheek, Dave twitched his hand and almost ended up slapping himself in the face when John moved his finger away again. It wasn’t that he didn’t like it, but wasn’t John taking things a little to quickly? Confused as to why John had over half the couch on the other side but was adamant on trying to squash him, Dave lamely remarked, “Oof, Egbert, are you trying to make a Strider pancake?” Then John looked up. And his face was just inches away from the sunglasses since he was leaning so heavily onto him. “Uh…
TG: he mumbled something as John looked searchingly at him, blue eyes trying to get through the wall the shades offered temporarily. And at that moment, the shades decided to be a douche to him again and started to slider slowly down once more.
TG: ((hm do you have contact info? It’s a little late here though I can stay a bit longer.))
EB: [[oh sure! both tumblr and skype!]]
TG: ((tumblr then? Don’t have skype xD))
EB: [[of course! egderppostshislogs.tumblr.com]]
TG: ((followed :D))
EB: [[boss! so shall we continue? until you head to bed, of course!]]
TG: ((yush! :D))
EB: [[just as a note, i am trying not push things too quickly while at the same time moving things forward. do you personally thing john’s moving too foward? Because I can go back to friendly banter if you wish. xDD Pffft, i’m just trying to make sure this doesn’t bore you completely.]]
TG: ((no, it bothers dave :D not me))
EB: [[kay, boss! i just want to keep my partners happy, bro.]]
EB: Oh wow, what was that? Dave’s shades were slowly pitching forward, giving John the perfect peek at those scarlet-colored peepers. “Wow.” He whispered aloud, butterflies rustling from within his stomach. Dave had.. really pretty eyes. Is this the way the main character felt in those silly girl animes? Because if so, John’s kokoro was totally going doki doki for Dave right now. John was simply staring at the other earlier, but now he was not only staring, but OOGLING. “Oh. Oh wow, Dave. Those are your eyes? They’re.. Wow. Completely freaking awesome.” cCould eyes be handsome? Because if that was the case, Dave had the handsomest, most amazing eyes John had ever seen.
TG: ((ffft kokoro xDDD)) John was starting to scare him a little bit… was it even possible to not blink for so long? Then Dave finally realized what he had failed to notice. The shades were practically dangling off his nose now, and he was looking at Egbert without the shades. And holy fuck those eyes were blue. Blue as the wall of text he had just read earlier. Quickly pushing his shades back up before he just went and did something stupid, he laughed awkwardly and tried to make an excuse for the red on his face. “Fuck, it’s even hot here. I thought Washington was supposed to be all rainy and cold and shit.” It was a desperate attempt but Dave was trying to escape with his dignity intact.
EB: [[haha i’m so wittttty. ;;DD\
TG: ((XDD Reading some of your logs. Sleep and wait :/))
TG: ((*can. Or maybe not if my typing’s this bad already XD))
EB: [[which logs are you reading? all my actual logs on my blog are tagged with ‘egderp posts his logs!’]]
TG: ((I don’t know, just flipping through the blog XD))
TG: ((you get disconnected on a lot? So far all the johns I got all replied and then fluff ensued XD But then its only a few times))
EB: [[yup!]]
EB: [[some people get bored with me, ect, ect.]]
EB: [[or i see someone rEALLY PROMISING, but then they have to leave. ; A ;]]
TG: ((er sorry timezones xD))
EB: [[like DIRK.]]
EB: [[hmmm?]]
TG: ((I think I saw that one))
EB: [[efffff. i just wanna find me a dirk. one day.]]
TG: ((well I do need sleep even if its only a couple hours))
EB: [[dude, it’s 4 am over here.]]
TG: ((I was randomly dirking earlier, got disconnected twice XD))
TG: ((whoa it’s only 1 here))
EB: [[xDD o wow.]]
EB: [[i am practically nocturnal. ;D]]
TG: ((I think I am a crappy dirk.))
EB: [[i live in Florida, mehhh.]]
EB: [[i will one day make my embarrassing OTP come true via rp.]]
EB: [[brojohn or dirkjohn]]
EB: [[OTL]]
EB: [[one day.]]
TG: ((hah XD))
TG: ((california here though i’ve been to florida for vacation and texas for about 2 hours to transfer :u ))
EB: Lightly papping Dave on the face, John snorted. “Are you serious? It’s nearly March, you dingus. It’s still a little nippy outside!” Ah ha! Caught the coolkid in a lie~ Inwardly congratulating himself, John outwardly just let it go. Dad was calling for dinner, anyways! “Boys! Time for dinner. Baked Alaska with steamed veggies and caramel brownies for dessert.” Gosh, Dad just loved cooking, didn’t he? That or he was out to impress. After some deliberation, John decided it was the latter. “Dave, give me a piggy back to the dining room?”
TG: Slightly indignant but ashamed that his hastily construed lie was caught, Dave huffed a little and settled back into the couch. Then the food came. To be honest, he probably couldn’t accuse John for eating so many cupcakes, since he ate Chinese takeout or fast food almost every day. So he leapt off the couch and picked up John, bridal style. “Nope. Payback for the humiliation!” he whispered into John’s ear as he flaild to keep his balance.
TG: ((hm just wondering, is it hard to find a dave? Because every time I caught a John shippy times happened.))
EB: [[normally? not very. however, it is difficult to find a /good/ dave. At least at first.]]
TG: ((Good dave? So what constitutes a good and bad dave?))
EB: [[some daves don’t know what they’re looking for, others have no set plot in mind.]]
EB: [[you know, they’ll sit there going “ummm…”]]
EB: [[you need to have a good idea to start a good rp.]]
TG: ((I usually go along with what the other plays. xD Or usually I go for the “crap I’m having a sexuality crisis” OTL I’m not very creative.))
EB: [[angst is always a good base for a rp. that or discovery.]]
TG: ((There’s nothing more fun than to write indenial! characters xD))
EB: [[like in a book: in order to push forward, something must first happen.]]
TG: ((Mhmm. I’m a fanfiction writer (for hetalia though) so I usually have some random plot bunnies floating in my head.))
EB: [[Those are fun too! Sometimes I’ll leave John open for leading, but alot of the times I just get frustrated and introduce my own plots onto Daves.]]
EB: [[I need to work on my interaction with Karkats. I tend to get flustered, even irritated when they get downright mean. OTL I can’t take insults too well, I’m afraid.]]
TG: ((Haha. xD I just like typing as Dave. especially cause im lazy and can get away with not putting apostrophes and cuss a lot and shit haha))
TG: ((Karkats. I came across a few Karkats. ._. I met a good one, and put up the crappiest argument ever, then disconnected in shame xD Then I met two who weren’t doing the good syntaz thing and didn’t even have witty comebacks. :C))
EB: [[i get witty sometimes, if the mood strikes me. I just rp as John, really. I don’t have the patience for more character study.]]
TG: ((Just Dave for me. Because I usually type like a cross between Dave and Rose, with all the big vocab and stuff but I can’t get her sarcasm right. :c))
TG: ((and with Dave he presses enter like every phrase. And I do that a lot in normal conversations. It’s just easy to type like him, so all I need is the actual context then.))
TG: ((Do you even sleep? o3o))
EB: [[i like the way John talks. Very care-free. Also ;B I love that emote. John and I are kindred spirit, nerds are we. :D]]
EB: [[hmm?]]
TG: ((4. I usually sleep at 2. XD))
EB: [[i sleep in around 30 minutes from now.]]
EB: [[then i wake up at noon or something similar.]]
EB: [[:U]]
EB: [[taking classes online is great.]]
TG: ((geez. ._. Ah, I have to rise up and make my way to school.))
TG: ((Not really bullied, actually. Just ignored.))
EB: [[[WUH?]]
EB: [[is this related conversation, chap?]
TG: ((Yes, through all my years I have not suffered bullying. No, I just happened to see a sad picture. :c))
TG: ((And maybe you might want to reply, I’m trying to figure out these stupid logarithims.))
EB: [[xDD pffft, kay.]]
EB: Flailing his arms, John let out an indignant squawk. “WAUH? Gosh, Dave! Worn a guy, would you?” Huffing unhappily at his position ‘this was a FAR cry from manly!’, the shorter teen could do little but kick his feet as Dave carried him to the dinning room. He was plopped into his chair then, doing little to protest as he hungrily dug into his plate of food. He would never admit it outloud, but John truly loved his father’s cooking. Especially the hand-made cakes. (Not the ones made by the batterwitch, gosh no! The ones made from scratch.)
TG: In an uncharacteristically childish gesture, Dave stuck his tongue out and pulled down his eye from beneath his shades, then turned to his food. Something that didn’t look like it was churned from a factory machine and then drowned in oil was good for once, and just the thought of all that grease sickened him slightly. It just sounded disgusting, but both he and his bro were too lazy to cook up any shit so takeout was the best they ever did. Though he glanced worriedly at John’s legs more than once during the meal. Though they were pressed together, Dave wasn’t even sure if John could feel his legs properly.
EB: John was scarfing down the last of his vegetables when he felt his medication start to wear off. He made this kind of.. face, an odd mixture between a silent sob and a grimace. The teen took a shaky breath, feeling the tell-tale burn of his nerves coming awake after their medication-induced slumber. John’s eyes began to tear up, but he didn’t say a word in fear of crying out. Instead he stared hard into his plate, as if trying to will away the pain. It hurt, it really did, and why did this had to happen just as he had begun to forget this had ever happened? He was started to feel normal again, dammit! But the pain just had to— tears dripped onto his empty plate then, the brunette’s shoulders shaking lightly from the force of his silent sobs.
EB: [[bringing back the pain, yo. :U]]
TG: ((D: Must sleep soon but I will reply!)) Everything was fine, or at least seemingly fine until Dave started to feel John move his legs agitatedly. Turning around to see what was happening, he was startled at the expression John was making. If he bit any harder Dave was sure he might have bitten a chunk of his lip off. Where was Mr. Egbert? Dave was feeling completely useless as he saw John
TG: ‘s tears well up in his eyes.
TG: Leaning forward shakily and completely at a loss at what to do, he wrapped his arms around John, as if some stupid miracle induced by a hug would help John. But it wouldn’t. A hug was just a hug, even if it was from The Knight of Time himself.
TG: Because John was always the hero, and the brave one. Dave was scared. Back then and now, he was still scared, since he always had a higher problem with mortality than the others after witnessing his own death so many times.
TG: Dave was so scared he wasn’t sure if he was doing this to help John of himself, but hearing the boy’s sobs cause his own hysteria to rise. Dave Strider was near the verge of panicking, and didn’t even remember shouting for Mr. Egbert.
TG: ((urgh sorry for the multiple enters, I’m just being a bit weird from the time.))
EB: [[xD it’s fine, alright?]]
TG: maybe time for one more reply XD
TG: ((oops forgot the paranteses x.x))
TG: ((brain dieeeed))
EB: But he had called out for John’s father. That is, in fact, where the older male had disappeared to. He had rushed to the cabinet to fetch John’s various pain medication; a numbing shot, and two kinds of pills. “Open your mouth, son.” Dad had whispered calmly into his son’s ear. “Hold out your arm while you’re at it, alright son? I am so proud of you for being strong during this.” Almost unthinkingly, John swallowed his pills. He didn’t even wince as he was given his shot! He just sat down and shoot as he waited for the medicine to kick in. John leaned into Dave’s arms, trying in vain to hold back his tears. “D-dave. Thank you.. so very much for being here with me.”
EB: “It really means so much.”
EB: [[well chap, i’m off to bed! keep this log bookmarked, alright?]]
TG: [[firefox saves my tabs, all is good XD]]
EB: [[we’ll come back to it tomorrow, alright?]]
TG: ((I’ll just tpe my response and you just go sleep now c:))
EB: [[xDD chorrrrome.]]
EB: [[okay! i’ll read your response then sleeeep.]]
TG: “H-huh? Yeah… that’s what bros are for aren’t they…” he trailed off, arms still stiffly frozen around John. He was scared that maybe if he let go, he would really lose John. But the dosages of medications frightened him, since he was pretty much drilled in the fact drugs could kill you. Burying his face into Egbert’s back, he hardly noticed the sunglasses shift upwards and fall off with a clatter. Absentmindedly his foot bumped into them, but they were still intact. The glasses John gave him were pretty good quility. “Egbert, you’re always scaring me. When you almost got killed my Terezi. When you got killed by Jack and came back with your windy thing. When Rose went grimdark and you went to follow her. And now. Jegus christ, you
TG: ‘re just trying to kill me, aren’t you?” he asked, leaking a bit of his own tears from his eyes.
TG: ((stupid apostrophes are too close to the enter buttons »))
EB: [[agree. now then, goodnight my friend! i shll reply once i awaken!]]
TG: ((nini o3o I shall leave as well.))
If this is not you, just ignore XD Anyway, here’s the log in all its unedited glory!
LIST YOUR HEIGHT, EVERYONE.
5’6”
5’9”
5’1”
5’4”
5’9”
5”7
5’4
4’9”
5’3”
5’3”
5’8” and a half.
5’1”.
6’0” WINNER.
The 38th GIF in your folder is your reaction to finding out you're pregnant with a member of your favourite band's baby.
Submitted by: Anon
Reblog if you're Nicolas Cage
I was watching a livestream and it stopped right here. and i was like, “beautiful face.”
Play
2:17
